labuznik

I am in the beginning chapters of my Menopause Coaching Specialist certification program.  To put menopause into perspective, between perimenopause, menopause, and postmenopause, half the population (IE, anyone with active ovaries) will spend half their life in a menopausal state.  

It has been both validating, as well as eye-opening to read about the various hardships women experience regarding menopause.  There is a serious lack of information, scientific studies as well as proven remedies for the plethora of symptoms women experience during this stage of their life.  I often find myself wondering if men experienced menopause or if the same attention that is given to d**k pills was spent on studying menopause, the current landscape would look much different for women.

Due to this gross lack of knowledge, the professionals we turn to often can’t help, don’t have the tools, gaslight their patients, and or don’t think it’s worth their time to learn more about menopause.  The gross imbalance, injustice, and one-sidedness of men’s healthcare VS women’s is disgraceful.  In addition, the single issue of autonomy over one’s body.  While we as a nation wouldn’t dream of regulating anything on a man’s body, apparently, a woman’s body is fair game. Not only that, everyone has a right over and can voice their opinions on every woman’s body.  Just sit with that for a second.  It’s utterly absurd!

Menopause is something we don’t talk about.  Just like a women’s period, it’s a taboo subject and something that’s swept under the rug at best, and at worst, girls and women are taught it’s shameful, dirty, and something to be hidden.  IE girls and women are not accepted as living, breathing humans, but we are shamed for our body’s natural biological processes.  And yet, without women and that biological processes, humans would cease to exist.  

A part of my journey I’d like to touch briefly on is how my cosplay has been affected during perimenopause.  My costumes offer little wiggle room.  My body is changing, despite continuing to work out 4-5 times a week and eating a relatively healthy diet.  Body change is a fact of menopause.  The last time I suited up for an event, I was a basketcase for about a month before.  I was worried that I might not look the same.  Or that my costume would be (even more) uncomfortable.  I’m sure no one sees the changes that are so clear to me, but as someone who has spent most of their life in fields that are body-critical (ballet, fitness, cosplay), it’s not been easy.  In addition, when you cosplay, it’s expected, however, right or wrong, that you have a similar look and body type to that character.

As part of this mid-life journey, I want to be less hard on myself.  I want to embrace this stage of my life, not resist it.  Because whether I like it or not, it is a “what is,” and embracing it is the healthier choice.  The unknowns that come with this stage of life are yet, another hurdle to overcome.  Up until now, my body has served me extremely well and was reliable with what I could expect from it.  I have been more or less the same silhouette for most of my life.   However, this new norm is difficult when you need to squeeze into a costume and feel like you are stuffed into a sausage casing.  

I have found success, validation, compassion, and understanding with female practitioners and female friends.  I vow to own this stage of my life.  I vow to be transparent.  I vow to help others.  I will not hide, be silent, or be ashamed of what I am going through.  I will continue to share my journey.  I am happy to chat or answer questions; all you need to do is reach out.  

Book Resources (I have not yet read but come highly recommended)

• The Menopause Manifesto by Dr. Jen Gunter
• What Fresh Hell Is This?: Perimenopause, Menopause, Other Indignities, and You by Heather Corinna  
• Free information on the website: girlsgonestrong.com (click on free articles, search menopause)

Things I personally have found helpful:

• Female OB/GYN & MD (PCP)
• Female Acupuncturist
• Female Naturopathic physician 
• Female Massage petitioner (releasing my psoas for low back and hip pain)
• Female therapist/life coach
• Female friends
• Exercising, stretching, and foam rolling 
• Cold plunges / cold therapy  (free & easy version – cold showers)
• Audio-guided meditations, meditative music, and music with healing frequencies
• Supplements: StressArrest & Femmenessence, both available on Amazon 
• A soothing cup of tea, or a cocktail, both nurture in their own way
• Grace towards self